I am a naturally shy and introverted person. I don’t think this is a bad thing at all. I am proud of who I am. This does mean however that I struggle with things that are more natural to some people, like networking.
Networking has never been something I am very good at. I convince myself that it isn’t important. I convince myself that I am the type that prefers to figure things out myself, but I know that is just an excuse. As I re-build my business in Colorado I am becoming convinced of how important and valuable having a network of people around you can be. There is this fear though, that dwells up in me every time I get into a networking situation that might be good for me. The fear is pretty deep too.
I have spent the last few days trying to figure out exactly what it is, and I think it is that I am afraid to succeed. I am afraid that I will get lots of great clients but I will then fail. I almost feel like a fraud, like I am not really a professional and that if I get to close to people who really are professional then they will figure me out for what I really am.
I know this is silly. In my head I can tell myself that I do know what I am doing. I am a good photographer and completely capable of being professional, but my heart doesn’t always feel that way. And that manifests itself as insecurity when dealing with others that I feel do have it all figured out.
I am still working on overcoming this. I am forcing myself into networking situations even though it scares me. I am working on convincing my heart that I do have what it takes. But it isn’t easy, and it takes time.
Do you relate to this at all? Have you had trouble with insecurity when networking with other professionals?